I believe I am redeemed by Gods grace and blood. I have no qualms saying that, it’s taken me a long time to realize and accept that. But I also wonder if I would have come to that point of realizing or even caring about it if I hadn’t been overwhelmed with the sinful mindsets I was instilled with. The hate I felt for muslims, gays and democrats (recovering fundamentalist) and the guilt I carried around for the millions of wounds I afflicted on Christ were things that drove my eyes to the cross and Christ’s sacrifice. Was it in the end, good to be riddled with those atrocities? Would I have looked for hope and grace if I was raised away from the warped mindset of earning your salvation (or repenting every 5 minutes)?

I don’t write this with any condemnation, merely regret and repentance. In the last few years I’ve denied, wrestled with & accepted (wash,rinse,repeat) the grace my god has bestowed unconditionally over and over. Through hundreds of conversations and dialogues I’ve come to amazing restoration for those parties mentioned but still have heaps of things on my spiritual ‘to-do’ list. I also have tremendous hope for the path before me as I transition from Romero-ish zombie to a less dead creature of mercy. I’m reminded of the stories of God constantly making good from the horrible things we do (even in God’s name). This is testament to the God of restoration.

EA=Evangelical Approved

ER=Evangelical Rejected

Superman- Superman represents the ultimate Christ figure in pop culture. He came from above to save humanity. He flies, he rescues, he hears prayers and never looks through girls clothes with his x-ray vision. the ‘S’ is for savior. EA

Spider-man- Spidey is a pretty standard protestant. Peter Parker is the archetypal boy-next-door so he probably goes to church every now and then and prays when he needs a raise at the Daily Bugle. But being religious and not talking about it with anyone or wearing christian T-shirts puts you in the lukewarm category. Sorry web-head, better start passing out tracts. ER

Batman- Though dark and brooding, his ends justify his means including bending social ethics. If it’s for the greater good, it can be rationalized whether its invading civilian privacy or beating the crap out of people for information. Dick Cheney would LOVE this guy.  Also, he tends to brutalize fruity guys dressed in purple. EA

X-men- While Wolverine represents as much of a ‘mans man’ Mark Driscoll could ever want to be, he is Canadian which is one point against him. However, the unforgivable sin of promoting evolution and mutation as means for their origins is a bottomless pit even the über-religious Nightcrawler can’t teleport out of. ER

Ironman- Tony Stark’s job is a weapons dealer and he fights bullies in Iraq. If that’s not a just-cause war, I don’t know what is, plus he fights alongside a guy named War Machine. War-mongering and keeping the arms-race running at full steam are his ace in the hole. EA!

Hulk- Evangelicals love the Hulk, and hate his alter-ego Bruce Banner. So when Bruce can’t figure something out with his cold, secular intellect he has to harness the power of his primal rage like the ark of the covenant killing pagan philistines. Factoring in the wussy alter-ego and the fact that he’s green (liberal agenda): Hulk in, Banner out. ER

Punisher- Punisher is the 2nd Amendment spokesman. File this one next to the picture of Jesus holding a rifle. EA with a bullet

Daredevil- C’mon. He promotes satanism with his moniker, fights big business (Kingpin) and practices social justice by being a non-profit lawyer? Glenn Beck would throw a fit. ER

Hellboy- Hellboy on the other hand promotes fear of Hell & eternal punishment with his name alone. Oh, he’s a demon? It’s ok, its for the greater good. Welcome to the flock, Red. EA

⁶So when they had come together, they were asking Him, saying, “Lord, is it at this time You are restoring the kingdom to Israel?” ⁷He said to them, “It is not for you to know times or epochs which the Father has fixed by His own authority; ⁸but you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be My witnesses both in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and even to the remotest part of the earth.”

The thing that popped out to me as I read it this time is the question before the verse 8 bomb. “is it at this time you are restoring the kingdom to Israel”. They were asking a very specific question regarding their own desires, probably to be out from the rule of the Romans. Jesus comes back and says ‘none of your business guys, BUT you’re going to be a part of this restoration you asked about through the power the Holy Spirit and the world will see it’.

With new perspective comes new understanding.

I see this as less of a ‘go, tell everyone you know about Jesus’ and more of an invitation and foretelling of the world they were about to change by ushering in the Kingdom of heaven to earth, not the other way around. In our culture there seems to be a lot of emphasis on spreading the good news to get people to heaven while leaving the earth in a trash heap which I obviously think is the infection of our society on the Gospel. That’s not to say that we are not to evangelize, but as the last thing Jesus said on earth I think it’s important to realize we are part of His kingdom and our world just happens to be the playing field. We are to be witnesses, but through the different lenses.

~Israel

- Yeah, man.

I should find a hotel.

-What?

What?

- A hotel?

Yeah.

- Just ask, man.

What are you talking about?

-Oh, God. Three pitchers of beer and you still can’t ask.

What?

-You called me because you needed a place to stay.

Oh, hey. No, no, no.

- Yes, you did. So just ask.

-Cut the foreplay and just ask, man.

Would… Would that be a problem?

-Is it a problem for you to ask?

Can I stay at your place?

- Yeah.

Thanks.
————————————–

I have currently been confronted with an issue of faith. A brother of mine recently told me he had decided to start praying for something I felt was impossible. Doing the good christian thing I said “well that’s gosh darn great, praise the lord”. Naturally my reaction in my head was “Are you crazy? Why don’t I just ask for a light saber and a giant squid monster and call it a day.”

Two things stood out to me in that statement. One, that he had decided to start, not that he had been praying about it. I don’t typically think about the things I pray for, while not considering ‘is this God’s will, and if it is why did it take me so long to ask in the first place?’ Have I considered I could be asking for a bird losing it’s wings when I ask for my own?

Secondly the fact that he was going to be petitioning something that should be considered nothing short of miraculous; good ol’ divine intervention. The faith I had as a child that would tell you in a heartbeat that God saved daniel from the lions, or turned water into wine has long been dead now, not because God is any less faithful, but I (think I) know too much. I blame the history channel on that; all their “could-the-exodus-actually-be-real” and “finally-the-mystery-of-that-one-miracle-in-the-bible-no-one-likes-to-talk-about-cause-it-confronts-scientific-thinking-revealedblahblahblah” shows. Fascinating as they may be, it sets my mind into a materialist corkscrew. I’m so distracted with the ‘hows’ that I overlook the ‘cans’ and ‘wills’. Maybe the reason I rationalize what to ask for and what to just suck up is because I think too much. I assume God’s just like me, rolling my eyes saying “ok, but I won’t be here to bail you out…..oh who am I kidding, of course I will” and getting the short end of the stick the whole time, like God’s strength or power (or even desire) arent enough to handle my little problems.

Behold the smartest termite in the world!

I’ll break this down:
If I as a christian believe in an omnipotent creator, one who (in theory) controls the tide, feeds the sparrow and sent a god-man to earth to pay my tab, why is it hard for me to ask for the impossible? Is my request less possible than creating the Leviathan or designing an immune system? Why would I hesitate to ask God to intervene in my family when He is the author of all that is good? My answer right now is faith. It was faith that drove Moses to lead the jews and jewettes into the wilderness. Would he have put off asking God for direction because he doubted his petition would be acquiesced? Doubt it.

I’m not sure this entirely makes sense, because it sounds like I want to not question anything. It’s more like I want to question everything, but there are some things that proof won’t make any more real for me. I will still question God’s promises to me and deny him the prayers He deserves and wants to answer until I have believe the things I ask for, in things unseen. Faith in miracles is faith in miracles. There’s only so much meddling God’s going to do without saying “ok look, I made a world, wrote a book, sent a son, made your parents chromosomes match up perfectly to make who you are, what more do you need? Just ask.”

Anyhow, that’s where I’m at, trying to muster up the strength and faith my brother has to pray for a miracle. Feeling like I’m due for one.

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND……..

~wrestleswithGod

CURRENTLY READING: Orthodoxy by GK Chesterton, LISTENING: Industry Giants by Superdrag, WATCHING: the Watchmen Motion Comics

~wrestleswithGod

I Might Be Wrong 12/19/08

Luke 15:11-32

The Parable of the Prodigal son is one of the most celebrated parables Jesus ever told and with good reason. It is simply a story of grace and unconditional love. 

For most of us the focus is on the main character having thrown his fathers fortune away and come back crawling and given a second chance at life. As I read and study it again, my focus was diverted not to the prodigal, but to the other son. I have waited patiently, I have stuck around even when I doubted, I have devoted my life to You and You let my kid brother who takes and takes and takes and takes back into our house to squander more. Does this make sense?

I say no, it does not.

I believe passionately that the Lord calls us to be fair and just with our fellow man. I also believe that those few that believe this is an absolute commandment also don’t follow it absolutely. We pick and choose who we want to treat just and fairly, instead of the unconditional love our father has presented as an example. I see this in every area of my life, from who I’m nice to at work to who gets a wave of forgiveness when a traffic mistake happens and who gets a finger.

So, I write all of this without a direct point or moral of the story besides the idea that maybe we are eager for damnation of others (thanks for the phrasing, Jay Baker). What about us inclines us to think that we deserve so much more than this spoiled kid? This is a story that takes the ideas that you get what you pay for and totally flips it on it’s head. If I work for 8 hours at my job and only get paid for 6, you bet your ass I’m going to file some kind of complaint, because it’s fair. It’s also fair that the older son in the story gets the house to him self and he can keep his action figure collection in his brothers room.

What the son deserves is to be expelled and sent on his way. What he gets is the royal treatment, even more so than the one that never left. That’s challenging. Of course were supposed to be happy he came back and it’s a happy ending and all’s well that ends well, but is that just? Thank God, it’s not. I have deflowered the sacred commandment of God by my judgement of my brother alone, let alone that time I watched a dirty movie online (only once, I swear). 

blahblahblahblahblah

I want to lose this idea of entitlement. I want to lose this idea of ‘but I did this’ or ‘I never left’ (in my best Veruca Salt impression) and get to the place where I can be comfortable in knowing that it’s not my call to make. It’s not up to me, it’s in my father’s hands and forever will be. I hope the Lord gives me strength to rejoice as He does when things aren’t fair and reconciliation is found is the arms of a loving father. May I be a brother of forgiveness and joy to celebrate the Good ‘and not always fair’ news.

~wrestleswithGod

Damn, it’s late. I went and drank about 50 shots of espresso at work again.

~I