As I said last night, I’ve always identified much more with the brother who stayed. I can actually feel his frustration and even anger, not knowing whether it should be directed at his father or his brother. I think I have some weird extreme sense of justice and fairness. You reap what you sow, damn it. (Mentally reminding myself to not say to my children “Life’s not fair.”)

But you’re right, it’s not my call. Daniel always reminds me that the only life I can live is mine (why is he always right?!). My grandma (mother of 6) had an old newspaper cartoon on her refrigerator for years. I don’t remember the picture anymore, but the caption read, “A mother’s favorite child is the one who needs her most right now.” That’s an infuriating thought when you grow up with a sister like Jessica, and you’re rarely the one who needs Mama most….

But maybe that’s the same sort of grace God extends to us: the un-ending, deep and forgiving well of grace and love that is truly undeserved.

One of the things I appreciate about the Bible and Christianity is that it is real. Real people and real situations.

There are three perspectives in the story- the father’s, the older son’s, and the prodigal. All three are important and valid…all three reflect real relationship. I don’t think God says for us “to be fair and just with our fellow man” exactly. I think we are called to deal fairly and justly in life, but to have mercy in our relations with others. Because we all screw up sometime, as you have said:”I have deflowered the sacred commandment of God by my judgement of my brother alone, let alone that time I watched a dirty movie online”.

The father’s answer to the older brother was a reminder that he didn’t have to live ascetically- the whole of the Father’s resources were his, as well. Until the prodigal’s events played out that wasn’t so evident. Didn’t the older son benefit from having avoided the heartache of the prodigal’s choices?

I think the prodigal had real pain. I think he had horrible shame, but that his circumstances brought him so low that he swallowed all pride and self-serving motivations. Many of us live lives so sheltered from that kind of pain that we mistrust how there is a true repentance and despair in such prodigals. None of us should wish to cause any more paint than that…

As older sons the sense of unfairness is also real and valid. It was the Father’s perspective that put it all in place for him.

In some ways I relate this parable to the event in Luke 7:46-48: You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.

Maybe the faithful older son learned to love more through the younger sinful brother. maybe that was part of how God works all things for good to those who love him? So maybe the older bro wasn’t so terribly bad and Pharisaical?

Thanks for the thought provoking post.